Famous Austrian exports: Mozart, Arnold Schwarzenegger, singing families in matching paisley outfits, Brüno and Hitler. Not so famous Austrian exports: Grüner Veltliner. Which is a bloody shame, because if ever there was a food-friendly, not-too-alcoholic summer refresher to show Pinot Grigio how it should be done, then Grüner Veltliner (or ‘Groovey’ as it is sometimes known, but only by wine-tits) is it.
Filling the gap between acidic Sauvignon Blanc and minerally riesling, Grüner is a bright, silvery wine of etherial clarity and refreshing zest – think alpine streams and edelweiss in a glass. Thankfully Grüner Veltliner is receiving more attention and praise in the press and decent examples can be found in more and more wine merchants from £8 to £12.
OddBins, after its lapse in mediocrity under the Castel group, is now back in independent hands and once more championing interesting, fun wines for reasonable prices. However, the Grüner Veltliner we tasted has been part of their line up for many years. Produced by Salomon, this ‘Groovey’ is a very reasonable £7.49 – what is not reasonable is their Austian attempt at punnery.
Design: German and Austrian wines tend towards the austere in both looks and (ignoring mass produced Blue Nun-types) taste. Tall, elegant bottles and labels with hints of gothic script and teutonic symbols are the norm, sometimes pared down to a simple name and logo as per the Weinreider label pictured below.
The Sal’mon Groovey label, however, presents us with a pink salmon sporting the kind of sunglasses that one associates with either Liam Gallagher or the 19th-century blind. We are then informed he is ‘Joe Cool’ (sunglasses=cool, natch) and he is NOT a salmon, which is a relief because he definitely looks more like a tu… wait, no he’s not a tuna either. Anyway, it doesn’t especially matter what kind of fish he represents as the wine will go with ‘most fine seafood, but not with eel.’
Now this seems a bit harsh to the humble eel to, in just seven words, promote it to the giddy heights of ‘fine seafood’ and then immediately exclude it from the platter. Why go out of your way to publicly humiliate your piscine brethren of the front of the bottle of wine you are trying to sell? Meanies.
I know all this not because I can read Austrian (if that were the case then I would forward the review onto the Grögger team in Salzburg) but because much of the label is in english and therefore I can only presume the intention of the fish is to tickle my British funny bone. Salomon sounds like salmon, Gruner Veltliner is called ‘Groovey’ – I get it. Pinot Gris sounds like grey penis but (thankfully) no-ones used that as their brand identity.
Design: 
Wine: The colour is of this wine is so clear, only the meerest flash of silvery-green identifies it as something other than water. The nose is delicate but bright and clean, with just the faintest zip of underripe pear. The flavour is precise and very, very refreshing. The taste of more tropical fruit that one might expect from a Sauvignon Blanc or Gewürztraminer are very much in the background, whereas restrained flavours of courgette, granny smith apples and even grass are to the fore. And to finish there’s a spicy, pepperiness that, combined with the vegetal aromas, is like tasting rocket leaves.
I can find no fault with this wine other than its utter perfection as a crisp, clean thirst-quencher. For once your thirst has been slaked, your appetite whetted and your fine seafood sampled, then this wine’s job is done, but done exceedingly well.
Wine:
A great summer wine for warm weather and light lunches. If you like this, try the Weinrieder Grüner Veltliner from Waterloo Wine Co.
But there is only one Joe Cool, and he’s not a fish.
Price: £7.49
Suppliers: OddBins, stores across the UK
Groggers: E.W. and S.C.